Welcome to my website!

I am the master of my domain! Well, my subdomain at least. Consider becoming a Neocities supporter like me.

Pour me one!

It's Beam O'Clock somewhere!

Click on pranks to watch me evil Pingu's head with a lorry battery

How did the leper castrate himself? -Jerking off.

No one is listening until you make a mistake.

Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.

"Have you ever noticed when you’re driving that anyone who’s driving slower than you is an idiot? And anyone driving faster than you is a maniac." -- Kevin James

On time

10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash. Now we have no Jobs, no Hope and no Cash.


I have an Amazon Kindle Fire to fight with — who needs a wife?

Revere jokes

Some jokes about our friends to the North

Why wasn't Jesus born in Revere?
Because God couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.
If you see a kid from Revere on a bike, why should you never swerve to hit him?
It might be your bike.
What do you call a Revere man in a suit?
The accused
What do you call a Revere girl in white sweatpants?
The bride
Why can't you circumcise a Revere man?
Because there is no end to those pricks.
Why do pigeons fly upside down over Revere?
Because there's nothing worth shitting on.
What should you do if you see a Revere man jogging?
Trip him up and give the lady's purse back to her.
How do you make a Revere man run faster?
Stick an Xbox under his arm
What's the difference between Batman and a Revere man?
Batman can go anywhere without Robin.
What do you call a Revere man in a three-bed house?
A burglar.
What's the difference between a Revere man and a coconut?
One's thick and hairy, and the other's a coconut.

Mike Myers

Mike Myers is a huge talent. If you like the movie, "So I Married An Axe Murderer", head over to Matt and Woody's 'Axey' website.

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Webmasters: Stevie (Woody) and Matt